By Colin Altevogt
Staff Writer
ESPN.comâ??s
Bill Simmons, in my opinion the best and most original sportswriter right now,
has a unique way of writing a lot of his preview articles. He takes quotes from
movies — in the past heâ??s done â??Good Fellasâ? and â??Anchormanâ? as well as a ton
of others — and then awards them to athletes, coaches, or teams as a way of
making predictions or highlighting points of interest in the upcoming seasons.
Bill Simmons, in my opinion the best and most original sportswriter right now,
has a unique way of writing a lot of his preview articles. He takes quotes from
movies — in the past heâ??s done â??Good Fellasâ? and â??Anchormanâ? as well as a ton
of others — and then awards them to athletes, coaches, or teams as a way of
making predictions or highlighting points of interest in the upcoming seasons.
I like the
idea. So, with thanks going out to Page 2 Man and the anonymous writers from a
particular website, here are 11 things to look for June 2 at the 2006 girls
track & field state meet â?¦ using Chuck Norris facts.
idea. So, with thanks going out to Page 2 Man and the anonymous writers from a
particular website, here are 11 things to look for June 2 at the 2006 girls
track & field state meet â?¦ using Chuck Norris facts.
â??Superman
owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.â?
owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.â?
To Sylvia
Massey, Tamara Adams, and Candyce McGrone — the three girls who will need to
be Chuck Norris for their teams on Friday. Massey will compete in both hurdle
races and both sprint relays. Adams will run
both hurdle races, the open 100, and the 4×4. McGroneâ??s workload will be just
as heavy with the 100, 200, 4×1, and 4×4. Six races in one day is no easy task,
but all of these girls have proven they can handle the schedule. All three won
each of their individual events and ran legs on victorious relays at the MIC
and SAC meets, widely regarded as the toughest conferences in the state.
Massey, Tamara Adams, and Candyce McGrone — the three girls who will need to
be Chuck Norris for their teams on Friday. Massey will compete in both hurdle
races and both sprint relays. Adams will run
both hurdle races, the open 100, and the 4×4. McGroneâ??s workload will be just
as heavy with the 100, 200, 4×1, and 4×4. Six races in one day is no easy task,
but all of these girls have proven they can handle the schedule. All three won
each of their individual events and ran legs on victorious relays at the MIC
and SAC meets, widely regarded as the toughest conferences in the state.
The best
performer of these three just may be helping her teammates hoist up a big,
wooden Indiana
at the end.
performer of these three just may be helping her teammates hoist up a big,
wooden Indiana
at the end.
â??Chuck
Norris never gets brain freeze. Slurpees know when to back off.â?
Norris never gets brain freeze. Slurpees know when to back off.â?
Perhaps
the most underrated, and my personal favorite, Chuck Norris fact goes to
perhaps the most underrated, and my personal favorite, race: the 800. The half
is stacked with a multitude of contenders coming from nearly everywhere in the
state. Warrenâ??s Melanie Gilbert won the MIC and Marion County
meets. Terre Haute Southâ??s Adriane Wunderlich set the stateâ??s best time in a
dual meet earlier this season. Evansville Centralâ??s Lauren Crick just beat
Wunderlich last week in the regional. Sniderâ??s Ashlee Lengacher ran the best
time in the state for the sectional round. South Dearbornâ??s
Kathy Klump, a former quarter-miler, gave Gilbert the business in her regional,
running a state-best 2:13.
the most underrated, and my personal favorite, Chuck Norris fact goes to
perhaps the most underrated, and my personal favorite, race: the 800. The half
is stacked with a multitude of contenders coming from nearly everywhere in the
state. Warrenâ??s Melanie Gilbert won the MIC and Marion County
meets. Terre Haute Southâ??s Adriane Wunderlich set the stateâ??s best time in a
dual meet earlier this season. Evansville Centralâ??s Lauren Crick just beat
Wunderlich last week in the regional. Sniderâ??s Ashlee Lengacher ran the best
time in the state for the sectional round. South Dearbornâ??s
Kathy Klump, a former quarter-miler, gave Gilbert the business in her regional,
running a state-best 2:13.
And thatâ??s
without mentioning the returning All-Staters.
without mentioning the returning All-Staters.
To Sarah
Kehe of Chesterton. The senior, who was runner-up in the state cross country
finals this fall, will compete in the 4×800, 1600, 800, and 4×400. Let me break
it down for some of you that may not be in the know. The 4×8/800 double is
tough. Running the 4×8/800/4×4 triple is very hard. (I know from experience,
dude.) Now, running all four events in one meet â?¦ thatâ??s insane. I can feel
lactic acid in my legs just from thinking about it. But last year, Kehe placed
second in the 4×8 and mile, medaled in the open 800, and anchored her mile
relay in 10th, just missing a fourth All-State performance. And
sheâ??s going to do it again this year. Not only does Kehe compete in these
events, she has quite a bit of success. Her 4×8 is the odds-on favorite to take
the title, and she could individually challenge in the 1600 while medaling in
the 800 and 4×4.
Kehe of Chesterton. The senior, who was runner-up in the state cross country
finals this fall, will compete in the 4×800, 1600, 800, and 4×400. Let me break
it down for some of you that may not be in the know. The 4×8/800 double is
tough. Running the 4×8/800/4×4 triple is very hard. (I know from experience,
dude.) Now, running all four events in one meet â?¦ thatâ??s insane. I can feel
lactic acid in my legs just from thinking about it. But last year, Kehe placed
second in the 4×8 and mile, medaled in the open 800, and anchored her mile
relay in 10th, just missing a fourth All-State performance. And
sheâ??s going to do it again this year. Not only does Kehe compete in these
events, she has quite a bit of success. Her 4×8 is the odds-on favorite to take
the title, and she could individually challenge in the 1600 while medaling in
the 800 and 4×4.
Incredible.
To
Chestertonâ??s Katie McColly and Jessica Pesut, two similar girls who could help
the Trojans surprise in the overall scores. McColly was third in a loaded long
jump field at the Highland Regional, with Pesut getting the first callback. If
these girls both have a breakout day, Chesterton could sneak up in the team
race.
Chestertonâ??s Katie McColly and Jessica Pesut, two similar girls who could help
the Trojans surprise in the overall scores. McColly was third in a loaded long
jump field at the Highland Regional, with Pesut getting the first callback. If
these girls both have a breakout day, Chesterton could sneak up in the team
race.
â??The
chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.â?
chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.â?
To Culver
Academiesâ?? Alex Banfich. The sophomore has already won a state championship in
cross country and should be among the favorites in the 1600 and 3200. As a
freshman, Banfich placed fourth and third, respectively, in the two distance
events. She may not win both, but she will certainly dish out pain to anyone
who wishes to challenge her distance-running supremacy. A double victory,
however, is anything but a lock. The mile is loaded with contenders such as
Sarah Kehe and Megan Jackson, both of whom are seniors with individual
runner-up titles to their names. In the 3200, Banfich actually comes in with
the second-best seed time behind Chelsea Blanchard of Carroll (Fort Wayne), who won a
lights-out race in the Fort Wayne Northrop Regional that saw five girls
advance. Look for Westfieldâ??s
Maggie Bingham toward the front as well.
Academiesâ?? Alex Banfich. The sophomore has already won a state championship in
cross country and should be among the favorites in the 1600 and 3200. As a
freshman, Banfich placed fourth and third, respectively, in the two distance
events. She may not win both, but she will certainly dish out pain to anyone
who wishes to challenge her distance-running supremacy. A double victory,
however, is anything but a lock. The mile is loaded with contenders such as
Sarah Kehe and Megan Jackson, both of whom are seniors with individual
runner-up titles to their names. In the 3200, Banfich actually comes in with
the second-best seed time behind Chelsea Blanchard of Carroll (Fort Wayne), who won a
lights-out race in the Fort Wayne Northrop Regional that saw five girls
advance. Look for Westfieldâ??s
Maggie Bingham toward the front as well.
â??Chuck
Norris can slam a revolving door.â?
Norris can slam a revolving door.â?
To the
Northrop girls program, winners of the past six state championships. Scoring by
regional performances, Northrop would again win the state championship. The
Bruins have basically just been shuffling talent in through a revolving door.
Is this the year it gets slammed shut?
Northrop girls program, winners of the past six state championships. Scoring by
regional performances, Northrop would again win the state championship. The
Bruins have basically just been shuffling talent in through a revolving door.
Is this the year it gets slammed shut?
â??They
say that lightning never strikes the same place twice. Neither does Chuck
Norris. He doesn’t have to.â?
say that lightning never strikes the same place twice. Neither does Chuck
Norris. He doesn’t have to.â?
To the Warren Central Relays,
where top-ranked Ben Davis and No. 2 Warren Central ended the meet tied.
That scenario playing out again is highly unlikely, but could lightning strike
in the same place twice, with the teams finishing the night as co-state
champions? And how would that even work?
where top-ranked Ben Davis and No. 2 Warren Central ended the meet tied.
That scenario playing out again is highly unlikely, but could lightning strike
in the same place twice, with the teams finishing the night as co-state
champions? And how would that even work?
â??Chuck
Norris doesnâ??t tie his shoes. They know they just better hang on.â?
Norris doesnâ??t tie his shoes. They know they just better hang on.â?
To Gary
Wirt sprinter Bionca Gildon. Gildon lied relatively low throughout the regular
season but has come on strong for the important part, running state-best times
in the 100, 200, and 400. Last year, Gildon competed in all three sprints at
the state meet, placing in the 200 and 400. Can she place in all three this
year?
Wirt sprinter Bionca Gildon. Gildon lied relatively low throughout the regular
season but has come on strong for the important part, running state-best times
in the 100, 200, and 400. Last year, Gildon competed in all three sprints at
the state meet, placing in the 200 and 400. Can she place in all three this
year?
â??When
Chuck Norris exercises, the machine gets stronger.â?
Chuck Norris exercises, the machine gets stronger.â?
To Rachel
Deloney, a sophomore and perhaps the stateâ??s best thrower. Deloney, who comes
in with the best regional performance in the shot and second-best in the disc,
has a legitimate chance to become the first double throws winner since 2003 and
the first back-to-back winner in the discus since 1983. But it wonâ??t be easy. Jeffersonvilleâ??s Sabrina
Johnson will look to defeat Deloney as she did in last weekâ??s regional.
Northropâ??s Faith Sherrill, seeded second in the shot put and fifth in the disc,
will be gunning for big points to contribute to the Bruinsâ?? seventh straight
title dreams.
Deloney, a sophomore and perhaps the stateâ??s best thrower. Deloney, who comes
in with the best regional performance in the shot and second-best in the disc,
has a legitimate chance to become the first double throws winner since 2003 and
the first back-to-back winner in the discus since 1983. But it wonâ??t be easy. Jeffersonvilleâ??s Sabrina
Johnson will look to defeat Deloney as she did in last weekâ??s regional.
Northropâ??s Faith Sherrill, seeded second in the shot put and fifth in the disc,
will be gunning for big points to contribute to the Bruinsâ?? seventh straight
title dreams.
â??Every
movie ever made would have been better with Chuck Norris in it. This is why in Hollywood the Oscar for
â??Best Actorâ?? is known as â??Second
Place.â?? â?
movie ever made would have been better with Chuck Norris in it. This is why in Hollywood the Oscar for
â??Best Actorâ?? is known as â??Second
Place.â?? â?
To the
competitors in the pole vault, minus Katie Veith, who will be competing for
just that: second place. On a side note, our state has probably the best female
pole vaulter in the nation. Yet, for some reason, weâ??ve paid no attention to
this. Thereâ??s more threads on the HoosierAuthority.com Forums about the
best-looking boys relay or best-looking individual boy than talk about Veithâ??s
pole vaulting exploits. And I blame no one but myself because, without bringing
up the pole vault, I posted on the â??4xhottâ? thread. Multiple times.
competitors in the pole vault, minus Katie Veith, who will be competing for
just that: second place. On a side note, our state has probably the best female
pole vaulter in the nation. Yet, for some reason, weâ??ve paid no attention to
this. Thereâ??s more threads on the HoosierAuthority.com Forums about the
best-looking boys relay or best-looking individual boy than talk about Veithâ??s
pole vaulting exploits. And I blame no one but myself because, without bringing
up the pole vault, I posted on the â??4xhottâ? thread. Multiple times.
I guess I
really have no point here.
really have no point here.
â??Chuck
Norris does not sleep. He waits.â?
Norris does not sleep. He waits.â?
To all the
coaches, who may have been doing the same thing since the start of the
tournament. And to think that I want to subject myself to the same thing after
college â?¦
coaches, who may have been doing the same thing since the start of the
tournament. And to think that I want to subject myself to the same thing after
college â?¦
Thank you,
coaches.
coaches.
The predictions:
100
1. Candyce
McGrone – Warren Central
McGrone – Warren Central
2. Tamara
Adams – FW Northrop
Adams – FW Northrop
3. Jaryn
Hamilton – Franklin Central
Hamilton – Franklin Central
4. Falana
Mason – Pike
Mason – Pike
5. Sherice
White – South Bend Washington
White – South Bend Washington
200
1. Candyce
McGrone – Warren Central
McGrone – Warren Central
2. Nikki
Smith – Muncie
Central
Smith – Muncie
Central
3. Lauren
Ford – Pike
Ford – Pike
4. Joy
Summers – Indianapolis Arlington
Summers – Indianapolis Arlington
5. Kelsey
Stephens – FW Northrop
Stephens – FW Northrop
400
1. Kandise
Thompson – Ben Davis
Thompson – Ben Davis
2. Ashley
Caldwell – North Central (Indianapolis)
Caldwell – North Central (Indianapolis)
3. Marta
Schiewe – Lawrence
North
Schiewe – Lawrence
North
4. Kelsey
Stephens – FW Northrop
Stephens – FW Northrop
5. Bianca
Gildon – Gary Wirt
Gildon – Gary Wirt
800
1. Kathy
Klump – South Dearborn
Klump – South Dearborn
2. Melanie
Gilbert – Warren Central
Gilbert – Warren Central
3. Ashlee
Lengacher – FW Snider
Lengacher – FW Snider
4. Mary
Catherine Quiett – Mishawaka
Marian
Catherine Quiett – Mishawaka
Marian
5.
Brittany Ade – FW Dwenger
Brittany Ade – FW Dwenger
1600
1. Alex
Banfich â??? Culver Academies
Banfich â??? Culver Academies
2. Sarah
Kehe – Chesterton
Kehe – Chesterton
3. Megan
Jackson – Northridge
Jackson – Northridge
4.
Kristina Krasich – Westfield
Kristina Krasich – Westfield
5. Rachel
Ehret – Lawrence
North
Ehret – Lawrence
North
3200
1. Alex
Banfich â??? Culver Academies
Banfich â??? Culver Academies
2. Chelsea
Blanchard – Carroll (Fort Wayne)
Blanchard – Carroll (Fort Wayne)
3. Maggie
Bingham – Westfield
Bingham – Westfield
4. Juliana
Roche â??? Fort Wayne Canterbury
Roche â??? Fort Wayne Canterbury
5. Rachel
Ehret – Lawrence
North
Ehret – Lawrence
North
100
hurdles
hurdles
1.
Vanneisha Ivy – Muncie
Central
Vanneisha Ivy – Muncie
Central
2. Tamara
Adams – FW Northrop
Adams – FW Northrop
3. Sylvia
Massey – Ben Davis
Massey – Ben Davis
4.
Meredith Hayes – Lawrence
Central
Meredith Hayes – Lawrence
Central
5. Katie
Johnson – Evansville Harrison
Johnson – Evansville Harrison
300
hurdles
hurdles
1.
Vanneisha Ivy – Muncie
Central
Vanneisha Ivy – Muncie
Central
2. Tamara
Adams – FW Northrop
Adams – FW Northrop
3. Sylvia
Massey – Ben Davis
Massey – Ben Davis
4.
Margaret Harris – South Bend
Riley
Margaret Harris – South Bend
Riley
5. Erica
Moore – Sullivan
Moore – Sullivan
4×100
1. Ben
Davis
Davis
2. Pike
3. Warren
Central
Central
4. Lawrence Central
5. FW
Snider
Snider
4×400
1. Ben
Davis
Davis
2. North
Central (Indianapolis)
Central (Indianapolis)
3. Warren
Central
Central
4. Lawrence North
5. FW
Northrop
Northrop
4×800
1.
Chesterton
Chesterton
2. Westfield
3. Northridge
4. North
Central (Indianapolis)
Central (Indianapolis)
5.
Zionsville
Zionsville
Long
jump
jump
1. Leah
Eber – Columbia City
Eber – Columbia City
2. Kim
Leinhoop – LaPorte
Leinhoop – LaPorte
3. Chelsy
Kimes – Munster
Kimes – Munster
4. Katie
McColly – Chesterton
McColly – Chesterton
5. Shawneeâ?? Mason – Ben
Davis
Davis
High
jump
jump
1. Emily
Breslin â??? Indianapolis
Cathedral
Breslin â??? Indianapolis
Cathedral
2. Megan
Schubert – Northwestern
Schubert – Northwestern
3. Ashley
Rhoades – Columbia
City
Rhoades – Columbia
City
4. Evie
Lehman – Adams Central
Lehman – Adams Central
5. Melissa
Buche – Lowell
Buche – Lowell
Shot
put
put
1. Rachel
Deloney – Bloomington
North
Deloney – Bloomington
North
2. Rachel
Thiel – Lowell
Thiel – Lowell
3. Faith
Sherrill – FW Northrop
Sherrill – FW Northrop
4. Dâ??Ana
McCarty – Pike
McCarty – Pike
5. Jasmin
Foster – Warren Central
Foster – Warren Central
Discus
1. Rachel
Deloney – Bloomington
North
Deloney – Bloomington
North
2. Sabrina
Johnson – Jeffersonville
Johnson – Jeffersonville
3. Heather
Roush – Southern Wells
Roush – Southern Wells
4. Faith
Sherrill – FW Northrop
Sherrill – FW Northrop
5.
Courtney Kuzmicz – Frankfort
Courtney Kuzmicz – Frankfort
Pole
vault
vault
1. Katie
Veith – Homestead
Veith – Homestead
2. Abby
Kimball – Carroll (Fort Wayne)
Kimball – Carroll (Fort Wayne)
3.
Stephanie Chin – Bloomington
South
Stephanie Chin – Bloomington
South
4. Dina
Petridis â??? FW Northrop
Petridis â??? FW Northrop
5. Alicia
Fritschi – Northridge
Fritschi – Northridge
Team
race
race
1. Fort Wayne Northrop
2. Warren
Central
Central
3. Ben
Davis
Davis
4. Muncie Central
5. Lawrence North
It’s been
a great season so far, and it only gets more exciting this week. Remember to
enjoy yourselves at the meet, and cheer on your favorite 4×8 relay second leg in
the second heat on Saturday 😉
a great season so far, and it only gets more exciting this week. Remember to
enjoy yourselves at the meet, and cheer on your favorite 4×8 relay second leg in
the second heat on Saturday 😉
You stay
classy, Indiana.
I’m Colin Altevogt.
classy, Indiana.
I’m Colin Altevogt.
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